Nine Years Later
Nine years. It’s hard to believe it’s already been nine years since my dad went home to be with the Lord. In some ways, it feels like a lifetime ago. In other ways, it still feels like just a few days. Grief has a way of bending time. It doesn’t ask permission to show up. Sometimes it comes quietly through a familiar song. Sometimes it’s the smell of coffee, a family gathering, or a conversation that makes you think, “Dad would have loved this.”
There are still moments when I instinctively want to pick up the phone and call him. I still think about asking his advice, hearing his laugh, or sharing another story from life and ministry. There are so many things I wish he could have seen. So many moments I wish we could have experienced together. The truth is, there are no words that fully describe how much I miss him. What I’ve learned over these nine years is that grief and gratitude can live in the same heart. I grieve because I loved deeply. But I’m grateful because I had the privilege of calling him my dad.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized more and more how much of him lives on in me. His fingerprints are on the way I love my family, the way I lead, the way I pastor, and even the way I face adversity. His life continues to shape mine long after his earthly journey ended. Death may separate us for a season, but it cannot erase a legacy.
As followers of Jesus, we don’t grieve without hope. We grieve because death is painful and separation hurts, but we also hold tightly to the promise of the resurrection. Because Christ conquered the grave, those who belong to Him have the assurance that goodbye is not forever. The older I get, the sweeter that promise becomes.
If you’ve lost someone you love, I want to encourage you today: don’t feel guilty for missing them. Missing someone is not a sign that your faith is weak; it’s a reminder that love leaves an imprint. Grieve honestly. Remember often. Tell the stories. Laugh at the memories. Cry when you need to. And let every memory point you to the God who walks with us through every valley.
One day, faith will become sight. One day, tears will be wiped away. One day, reunions will replace goodbyes. Until then, I’ll continue thanking God for the years He gave me with my dad and for the hope He has given me through His Son.
Nine years later, I still miss you. I still love you. And I still thank God for you. “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain”