What’s Happening in Me Matters More Than What’s Happening to Me

It’s easy to become consumed with what’s happening to us. The unexpected bill. The relationship that changed. The prayer that still hasn’t been answered. The door that closed. The disappointment we didn’t see coming. The season that has lasted much longer than we thought it would. And naturally, our prayer becomes:“God, please change what’s happening around me.”

But lately I’ve been reminded of something: What’s happening in me matters more than what’s happening to me. That doesn’t mean what I’m going through doesn’t matter. It matters. The pain is real. The disappointment is real. The pressure is real. But God may be doing something inside of me through what is happening around me. Paul writes in Romans 5 that trials develop endurance, endurance develops character, and character strengthens hope. In other words, the trial isn’t just something I’m trying to get through. God can use it to produce something in me. Maybe I’m praying for God to remove the pressure while He’s using the pressure to deepen my faith. Maybe I’m asking Him to change my circumstances while He’s working on my character. Maybe I’m asking Him to make the road easier while He’s making me stronger for the road ahead. Maybe I’m asking, “God, when will this end?”And God is asking, “Who are you becoming while you’re here?” That changes the way we see difficult seasons. Instead of only asking: “Why is this happening to me?” We can begin asking:“Lord, what are You doing in me?” Are You teaching me patience? Are You exposing something in my heart that needs surrender? Are You teaching me to trust You when I can’t see the outcome? Are You breaking my dependence on things I thought I needed? Are You teaching me that Your presence really is enough? Paul gives us another powerful perspective: “Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day.” — 2 Corinthians 4:16 NLT

Notice the contrast. Something can be happening outwardly while something completely different is happening inwardly. Things around you might feel like they’re falling apart while God is putting something together inside you. You can be experiencing pressure and still be growing. You can be grieving and still be healing. You can be waiting and still be becoming. You can be struggling and still be getting stronger. You can be walking through something you would never have chosen and still someday look back and say: “God used that season to change me.” We spend so much time asking God to change our circumstances. Maybe sometimes the more important prayer is: “Jesus, don’t let me waste this season. If You’re going to allow me to walk through it, use it. Search me. Shape me. Strengthen me. Teach me. Make me more like You.”Because eventually circumstances change. Seasons end. Doors open and close. People come and go. Money comes and goes. Problems come and go. But the person I am becoming through it all matters. So today, I’m trying to worry a little less about everything happening to me and pay closer attention to what God is doing in me. Because sometimes God doesn’t immediately change the situation.Sometimes He changes us in the situation. And when we finally come out on the other side, we realize: The greatest thing God did wasn’t around me. It was in me.